It's a good thing she's tiny.
That's okay though. My parents are still storing some of my crap too. Namely, the pool table we got for free from Philly's sister.
That, and all those sweet antiques I'm going to steal when they're senile enough not to notice they're gone. I already scored this trunk and sewing cabinet. But those don't count since I didn't acquire them by stealth.
This desk set (I use the term "set" loosely...I'm pretty sure they're a blended family) was one of the treasures to come home to roost.
That means Mama uses it however she wants.
Like to support her laptop. And her generous ass.
That upholstery was heavy-duty, but surprisingly easy to remove.
I decided to give the set a makeover.
Philly says, "Did you ask Emma first if you could paint it?"
Me: "No...but I just painted the next-door neighbors' satellite dish and I didn't ask them either."
No big.
So I got my yellow on and used up some leftover fabric from my new curtainry.
I was so amazed at my painting prowess.
If I'm known for anything, it's my attention to detail.
Stickler for detail baby. Nothing gets past me.
I'm a freaking master.
**********************************************
Hey Jackass.
You missed a spot.
**********************************************
So, I may have painted the stool while it was upside-down. Oops.
I rectum-fied the situation. But apparently I forgot to close the drawer all the way.
I left the top alone because it was laminate and impervious. Unlike paint. I've painted laminate tops before HERE and HERE, but laminate is like the Dick Clark of surfaces. It looks brand-new forever.
Oh shit. I mean Casey Kasem.
Oh shit. I mean Casey Kasem.
Oh wait. He just died, didn't he? Did they ever get him buried?? Oops again. This post is froth with inappropriateness.
But I totally fixed it.
Which brings me to my next (and most relevant) question.
When you find a fruit fly in your wine, do you scoop him out and finish your wine, or do you dump your wine and start over?
I totally scoop him out and keep drinking. That actually might explain this post.
And what the hell is up with my 99 GFC followers? I've been at 99 forever. Can't someone help a wino out? Send me a friend.
Or this post will be brought to you by the #100.
And it will keep me up all night.
scoop and drink, if it's the second bottle, probably just drink, added protein wards off the hang over. I love the desk make over beautiful and I have done the "missed a bit" so many times it's not even funny.
ReplyDeleteSherry Ellis sent me some adorable followers recently. I'll tweet you and Google+ you and maybe #100 will show up. You did a beautiful job on the desk.
ReplyDeleteLove,
Janie
YAY, I win... I'm number 100.. what do I get?
ReplyDelete(I thought I had already joined months ago)
I've given up trying to figure out social media. For over a year my Facebook followers were pretty much the same, then a few weeks ago I gained 130 in one week. Wtf?? Other than marry Clooney that. week, I didn't do anything different. Go figure.
ReplyDeleteCute desk, and how lucky you found a chair big enough for your bodacious butt! bwwwaaaaaa!
I really enjoy all of your painting posts and that pattern (not sure what the name of it) on your curtains is beautiful. And, I had a fruit fly get in my wine a few weeks ago and I just could not scoop out and continue drinking... my husband finished it for me and got me a new full glass. haha!
ReplyDeleteI would never dump a glass of wine unless it was filled with jagged edged glass....soooo, scoop and fling is my motto.
ReplyDeleteBench looks FAB!!!! Once again, you rock the casbah!!!
Fondly,
-Lisa
The desk looks great! I love it with the rug. Casey still isn't buried, that really creeps me out. Even more than that bug in your wine! : )
ReplyDeleteI love the makeover. If I threw out things that had a fruit fly in it, I could never eat. I am faced with a plague. I dip them out of anything and finish the drink or meal. My count of followers has been steady for so long that I suppose that is my limit...lol.
ReplyDeleteThank goodness we're reaching the end of the season!!
DeleteThank you for making me laugh before I go to school, which I am always hating by Friday. Is it time to retire yet? What's that you say? 2018? Can't happen soon enough, which is why I'm writing THIS DA#N BOOK so that I can publish it and make $127.43, which is about what I make in a day of teaching school. That is all.
ReplyDeleteOh, and I totally miss huge swaths of any object I paint. DL has to go along behind me and double check. I am both ADD and blind, apparently.
ReplyDeleteFroth with inappropriateness...that's one of the many reasons I love you! Love your little desk too and the fact that the seat matches the awesome curtains. Never know what you're going to find in blog pictures...Once I found a can of beer in one of my blog pictures of my laundry room. Had no idea where it came from...wasn't even a kind we drink.
ReplyDeleteI write this blurry eyed this morning from all the tears from laughing sorry if there are misspelled words can't see the board real well. Laughing at the comments left too....the desk "set" is cute! wonder where Casey is hanging out these days? not buried, kind of different. Is Joan buried? Wondered if there are issues with all the plastic surgery that they don't require burial. Will we find them in the wax museum? .....Fruit flies are no match for my fingers "flick & fling" method used here once in awhile they do pass the tongue but usually at that point I don't really care...second bottle and all.
ReplyDeleteThere is a chance my comment got eaten...let's pretend it was hilarious!
ReplyDeleteAh ha ha ha ha ha.
ReplyDeleteI scoop.
I will gladly part with 999,000 of my middle eastern men that follow me on G+
Your generous ass and painting prowess are second to none! (Is it creepy that I'm pretending I know what your ass looks like?)
ReplyDeleteI will not be posting a picture of my ass. We'll all have to use our imaginations..... ;)
DeleteYour desk looks lovely! And THANK YOU for posting your temporary painting mishap. When bloggers post all their projects to appear as if they were done flawlessly I get a feeling of inadequacy.
ReplyDeleteFruit flies: I place a decoy glass filled with a teaspoon of wine on the counter when I'm drinking wine, hoping they'll perform their kamikaze in that. Fruit flies are geniuses though and they follow me and dive into my glass regardless. Therefore I designate a spoon as the fly-flicker for the evening. During the harvest season when my counter is full of fresh produce, this may result in many flicks per night. I haven't died from fruit fly cooties yet.
HAHA you paint just like me....but then you go back and finish it and make it look perfect! I love the colors! When I get a fruit fly in my wine, it usually means a ruined batch :( but if it's in a glass, I call it protein! Thanks for my morning chuckle!
ReplyDeleteDandi Andi...that makeover is darling even if you missed a few spots. I'm afraid that Emma may want it back when she sees it. How did the satellite dish turn out? I'd like mine painted to blend in with the trees, please. When can you start???
ReplyDeleteahhh love the new look. I'm sure she won't mind. if she does too bad!
ReplyDeleteI have scooped all sorts of tiny flying bugs to finish drinking all sorts of beverages.
ReplyDeleteDo love the redo! :)
I like this
ReplyDeleteWell, hell. I come here exhausted after two hours in Hobby Lobby, and you've been up to your usual foul deeds. Painting, reupholstering, re-painting. I would have enjoyed it as it was, but I'm lazy like that. But...ya know that blank wall in my bedroom? You'll be getting photos after I finish with it. My craft room is wall to wall with parts and pieces, ready to go: Or not. I might be too tired.
ReplyDeleteI would trade me glass with the husbands and feign innocence. I just noticed that I wrote trade "me" glass. Is it talk like a pirate day, or have I traded too many glasses of bug infested wine with the mister?
ReplyDeleteAnd forgot an effin apostrophe. EFF! Do you know I'm the husband's grammar checker? I really am. How many inappropriate verbs do you think he got busted on with his last paper? Many. But, guess how many semi colons I demolished in place of commas. Lots and they were all correct. What's the husband's deal with semis? I think we also got called on a hanging chad or two... :)
Deletebeautiful makeover! (and I hope you get the 100th soon)
ReplyDeleteI love the little yellow table!!! I have been known to have less than perfect attention to detail at times too!! So funny. And I'd swear I got it all...only to find that I didn't. lol
ReplyDeleteI've also been known to scoop the fruit fly out of my wine...or gnat, whatever ...because who wants to waste a whole glass of wine on that?
Well, I don't know what you're saying... You have 100 followers... Aren't you drinking too much wine?
ReplyDeleteAs I said, late to the party. Love the makeover! But...uh...what's GFC??? Dona
ReplyDeleteI NEED you in my life to make my house look like this!!! And I drink the fruit flies. Extra protein.
ReplyDelete