Monday, May 2, 2016

tailoring a bed skirt

Since the dawn of time, bed skirts have conspired to crush my soul. Oh, the lifting of the mattress, the positioning of the skirt, the replacing of the mattress. The intense physical combat. The sweating and the swearing. Well, I actually enjoy the swearing part.

We have an all-foam mattress which rests its weary flesh on a wooden frame that doesn't play well with bed skirts.

Here's an older picture of our room, and you can see the disaster that is the bed skirt. Frumpy and dumpy and grumpy.



The frame is very short, so the skirt sags depressingly on the rug.

Here, take a scandalous peek under my skirt. I dare you.



See my quilting mat under the bed? Technically, it's my daughter's quilting mat, but possession is nine tenths, as they say.

This always happens as well:



Despite the fact I hate making the bed, I make it almost every day.


I'd always planned on doing something about the skirt, but this happened. Daily.



That's but a sampling of the damage he's done to this comforter. But Eddie has a history of claiming this land for Spain. If there are beds and pillows involved, you can bet your furry bum he's there.



He even finds himself trapped in the pillows. No escape in sight.




Who, me?



But Eddie just had his 14th birthday and our little old man has finally given up on jumping up on the bed. As sad as it makes me knowing he's winding down, it also means I can buy a comforter for the bed and have it stay super-duper nice.

So I did.

I threw the new, offensive bed skirt on the floor. The floor was probably dirty, but I most likely didn't care. Perhaps grease spots will haunt my future.



I proceeded to defile the skirt by cutting off all the white part that normally resides beneath the mattress. Then I got out my seam ripper and continued the desecration.



Soon I had three pieces of fabric that perfectly matched the new comforter set. I'd better not screw this up because I'll never have the recipe again.

Oh no.

Philly took me on a date to Home Depot where we bought a piece of luan and cut it to fit the sides and foot of the bed frame. I wrapped it with bug-infested (they were dead) quilt batting.



Then we wrapped with skirt fabric thus.




Halfway through, the pneumatic stapler died. Philly disassembled the demon, found the broken part, swore a bunch, then traveled to Menards to purchase a new one.

We've ordered the replacement part for the original. Now we have serious back-up.





Stapled on some velcro...



Added velcro to the bed frame so they could have relations...



By the way, dusting is for sissies.



The end result? Thank goodness you asked, because I've had enough wine to fell a horse, and I need to close down for the night.

Oh, happiness abounds.



So clean and streamlined.



If you missed my DIY headboard post, go check it out!



My new comforter set is very similar to the previous set, minus the doggie rips and tears. (Bedding can be found HERE.)

Seriously. Why haven't you checked out the headboardHometalk thinks I'm awesome even if you don't.

And just so you don't think I'm a heartless bee-yotch...


Look who's back in Spain.





Linking to:
DIY Dreamer

Swing Into Spring
Saturday Sparks

67 comments:

  1. Freaking AWESOME!!! Belated Happy Birthday to Eddie. ;) Your efforts are showing as a sweet looking bed my friend. Thanks for the ideas! (I really, REALLY hate bed skirts.) ~ Christina in FL

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  2. Yep! Brilliant, as usual! Eddie is still the star of the show, though. Did it take long to bake it? (sorry, that's all I remember of that song) Dona

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    1. Between running to Home Depot, ironing, cutting, stapling, running to Menards to replace the broken stapler, etc., it took most of the day. But well worth it. :)

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  3. That is so sharp looking! But how are you going to get your quilting mat back out? The pets vs nice fabric conflict goes on at my house as well...

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  4. So that's a pretty slick tutorial on making a bed skirt. But someone left the cake out in the rain. Perhaps it was those two dwarfs who I don't recognize their names with Grumpy.... Frumpy and Dumpy.

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  5. Excellent work, and I share your frustration with bed skirts. Even when the length is correct, they shift with the mattress.

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    1. Aren't they a pain?? I'm so glad I don't have to trip over mine anymore. :)

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    2. Very nice project and very entertaining to read.

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  6. Love this! I just ripped my baby's bedskirt while trying to adjust it. Grr. Also, Ginger is not allowed on beds, no way!

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  7. Love this! I just ripped my baby's bedskirt while trying to adjust it. Grr. Also, Ginger is not allowed on beds, no way!

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  8. I LOVE this!!! What a fantastic idea and I think I may just have to copy you! And Eddie....well he's just perfect!

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  9. Brilliant!! That is absolutely brilliant!! How perfect for your bed. I am duly impressed. :)

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  10. Ahhhh, this is brilliant! I hate bed skirts, too and we have them on ALL of our beds... and, they're all in shambles (half on, half off... all bunched up, etc.). Eddie is such a sweetheart, I am sorry too he can't jump on the bed anymore :( Its sad when they get old!

    Carrie
    curlycraftymom.com

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  11. Still trying to recover from seeing under your skirt! I cannot imagine my husband and I being on the same page long enough to complete more than a two step project without him wandering off! Phil Rocks! (as does Eddie, of course)

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  12. I love this idea. I wonder if it would work on a metal bed frame, gluing the velcro on. My dogs got so old, I don't have the bed on a frame, they have an ottoman and now also an old sofa cushion to step up to the ottoman... spoiled a bit!

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  13. The after picture is much better then the before one, just so you know

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  14. Oh! Home Depot DATES! We are going to be besties! I can just tell....

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  15. Awesome project and post! You never fail to make me laugh out loud! I'm a "cusser" too and the way you word stuff is so like I do! Happy Birthday to your adorable, Eddie! As I type this my two bed loving pups and one bed loving cat are on my bed beside me!

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    Replies
    1. Awww...fuzzy snuggles! Thank you for visiting and saying hello!

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  16. I just had to say great job and tremendous HUMOUR (yes Canadians spell it THAT way girl ) .. I read the post from your 15th anniversary on how you and Philly met and it was too damn funny .. I needed a laugh today and that was PERFECT !
    Thank you ! .. The "F" bomb is my weakness too .. "Garden PA" aka hubby is used to it so I get a free pass when needed ; ) .. Eddie is a sweetie !

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  17. Best DIY project I've seen in a while. Must do this and Eddie of course is the star of the show.

    Thanks for sharing!!!

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  18. You've made me laugh like no one has in a while! Give your Eddie a hug for me, I've got two "Eddie's" of my own. Your bed skirt idea, brilliant!! Excellent tutorial and pictures. Thanks much for the humor and great ideas.

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  19. Did you lift Eddie onto the bed or get him a set of doggy steps? I bought doggy steps because I hoped Franklin would join me in bed. He could jump on the bed and had once, but refused to join me again. Fear of heights, I guess. Willy Dunne Wooters tried to teach Franklin to use the doggy steps. Willy Dunne Wooters stepped on the doggy steps to demonstrate their use to Franklin. Willy Dunne Wooters broke the doggy steps and fell on his asshat. Favorite Young Man repaired the doggy steps. Willy Dunne Wooters sat his asshat on the doggy steps because he needed to change his shirt and changing his shirt while erect (ha ha) was too much work. Again, he broke the doggy steps. FYM said, $#@! Thank God Penelope came along with her legs made of springs. She hops right in the bed and cuddles up to Mom Mom. Franklin prefers the rug next to the bed. My bed skirt looks like shit. I'd ask if I could send it to you for repairs, but I don't really care if the bed looks like shit. I don't even make my bed. The rest of the house looks great, of course.

    Love,
    Janie

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  20. WOW! Great makeover! The result is so much neater. Eddie is so darned cute!

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  21. Cindy
    Have you tried this on a metal frame? I have 2 that I want to do this to. Let me know if you have any other hints or ideas please.
    Judy

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    1. I have not tried with a metal frame, but I think the velcro would stick just fine to metal. It won't stick to the fabric on its own, so you would still want to staple or stitch it to the fabric.

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  22. Hiding crap is of the utmost importance! I just added a link to the bedding in the post. Thank you so much for visiting!

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  23. I'm going to try it. I'll let you know. 😀

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  24. It looks really great, like out of a magazine, but I'm glad Eddie is still allowed on!

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  25. Well, just look at you...Eddie told me you were giving his bed a makeover but I didn't envision such a spectacular event with the added bonus of a tutorial! Can I just call it a tute? Different from a toot. It looks so great! And you can pop them off to change out the fabric in case you get a big dog and they rip your fabric on accident. He says he's innocent, but IDK. ;)

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  26. THAT is WAY to much for me...so I'm thinking...can I cut off the part that goes under the 5 thousand ton mattress, and just simply put velcro on the remaining pieces that are supposed to show and also velcro the box spring and just pop them together?? Would that work?? I realize that is the kindergarten version but I number one, dont have a husband or a staple gun and u have NO IDEA what it was you purchased at homo depot. (As I call it)...

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    1. I've heard where people do that velcro trick! What have you got to lose, right?? (Well, I guess you have a bed skirt to lose...) =D

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  27. THAT is WAY to much for me...so I'm thinking...can I cut off the part that goes under the 5 thousand ton mattress, and just simply put velcro on the remaining pieces that are supposed to show and also velcro the box spring and just pop them together?? Would that work?? I realize that is the kindergarten version but I number one, dont have a husband or a staple gun and u have NO IDEA what it was you purchased at homo depot. (As I call it)...

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  28. Our little boy is dragging down, as are Joe and me. We say we'll be able to "do this" and "do that" when he leaves us, but my main thought is "Yes. We'll have the chance, but without him, I won't have the willpower." So I understand. Our hardest part has always been trying to lift a King mattress and slide the flimsy bedskirt underneath. Thanks to you, that will never be a problem.

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  29. This is GREAT!!! I have a love hate relationship with bedskirts too! I love this idea!

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  30. Love your idea, and truly enjoyed your personality that came through in your description. My Eddie is called Jessie James, we didn't have him neutered because we intended to breed him. Sadly now that he is in his later years of life, he has started marking the house, especially bed skirts, or curtains that hang to the ground. I am bed bound disabled so Jessie is on me or next to me the majority of the time. We installed a baby gate with swinging door so that we are not shut off from the world, but he can't leave the room to share his greatness in our guestroom. Washing bed skirts is time consuming and extremely painful to re-install even with the help of my Superman. I am going to follow your lead and fix our master-bed a fraction off the ground so that my outlaw Jessie perhaps can't reach it spraying his domination.
    I also love the idea of bed cushion, step stool, then onto the bed. Our bed sits high as Superman is 6'6" and doesn't like to sit low when climbing in. I haven't had much luck with getting Jessie to use the steps. I did hear of using the bottom drawer of your nightstand filled with a firm pillow as a stepping stool. He's not heavy enough to budge the nightstand, so I was thinking of giving it a try. Maybe get some matching fabric to accent my duvet and follow your lead then use same fabric to make his cushion. The skirt we have has light spots from his past discrepancies, so that isn't worth using.
    I feel inspired for two projects, thanks so much.
    KB

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  31. Love your idea, and truly enjoyed your personality that came through in your description. My Eddie is called Jessie James, we didn't have him neutered because we intended to breed him. Sadly now that he is in his later years of life, he has started marking the house, especially bed skirts, or curtains that hang to the ground. I am bed bound disabled so Jessie is on me or next to me the majority of the time. We installed a baby gate with swinging door so that we are not shut off from the world, but he can't leave the room to share his greatness in our guestroom. Washing bed skirts is time consuming and extremely painful to re-install even with the help of my Superman. I am going to follow your lead and fix our master-bed a fraction off the ground so that my outlaw Jessie perhaps can't reach it spraying his domination.
    I also love the idea of bed cushion, step stool, then onto the bed. Our bed sits high as Superman is 6'6" and doesn't like to sit low when climbing in. I haven't had much luck with getting Jessie to use the steps. I did hear of using the bottom drawer of your nightstand filled with a firm pillow as a stepping stool. He's not heavy enough to budge the nightstand, so I was thinking of giving it a try. Maybe get some matching fabric to accent my duvet and follow your lead then use same fabric to make his cushion. The skirt we have has light spots from his past discrepancies, so that isn't worth using.
    I feel inspired for two projects, thanks so much.
    KB

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  32. I have a bedspring that is made of metal covered in cloth. It's springy and moves up and down with weight on top.....AKA: my body in a sleeping position. My bedskirt goes between bedspring and mattress. I also have a love/hate relationship with bedskirts. Will this work on my bed since I have the bedspring and only a half size frame that doesn't stick out at the bottom of the bed and my bedspring is really UGLY. DH.

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    1. I'm not sure if my version would work exactly, but I have heard from a lot of people about attaching velcro all around your box spring, and attaching fabric to the velcro. That way you don't have the whole bedskirt between the mattress and box spring. I think if I had your setup, I would try that!

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  33. LOOKS SO VERY SLEEK AND CHIC...GREAT JOB!

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  34. I love the way you write! It’s like sitting with a long-time friend over a cup of coffee! Casual, funny, picturesque, but very informative. The simplicity of the bed skirt framed the new comforter rather than competing with it. I like it!

    Definitely subscribing to your blog.

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    1. Awww, thank you so very much! And welcome!! I hope to hear from you again!

      xoxo
      -andi

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  35. YOU ARE HILARIOUS!! I'm not much for reading blogs or commenting. I was compelled & enjoyed yours so much. The problem is definitely universal but we don't all have your ingenuity. I'm doing this one.
    But I cried a river when I noticed Eddie had passed....I'm so sorry for your loss.

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    1. Thank you, and thank you! I'm glad you found me. Yes, we cried rivers, too, when we lost Eddie. We were truly bereft and were convinced we could never have another dog. Twelve days later, we adopted Gracie. And she has been such a blessing!

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    2. Whole hearted agree. Great read.

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  37. Andi, this is a great idea! One question.....how did the corners turn out? Do they just butt together? is the end piece of your new skirt longer - to cover over the ends of the 2 side pieces?

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  39. What a great idea!! One question, would you suggest doing this on a metal frame

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  40. ok- I did this twice and I don't know where my comments went.#^^%%$$ Please subscribe me and add me as a fan. I have to go kill my computer. Thanks. L4potts@yahoo.com Lisa

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  41. Thank you for making my day! I haven't laughed this much in a long time. Looking forward to hearing from you again. You truly have a gift with words and dig too! 😉

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  42. I meant diy. I'm sure you hate auto correct too!

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  43. I love the commentary and how you showed your love for Eddie!! This is a very nice look and one thing to add: when you accidentally stub your toes in the future there’s a little cushion to save the day.

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  44. Love your problem solving. We have a metal frame that we have up on two head of bed risers ( reflux precautions). And yes I slide down the bed ... have learned no higher than 450 thread count and definitely no silk sheets! Lol
    So was thInking of making/finding a bracket using a piano hinge to attach to another bracket which attaches via a few screws to the metal frame. Piano hinge cut to three sections along the upper portion closest to the mattress line. Bottom edge would follow the line of the floor of course... so my geometry will be stretched on this project. Still need to keep the wrapping paper boxes under the bed.

    Any ideas peeps into problem solving these attachment ( reusable too) issues, without Velcro?

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  45. Thank you for helping me figure out a way to keep my little dogs from getting into stuff under the bed! I store boxes under my bed... and I just love your solution!!!

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  46. Great idea!!! I love your sense of humour...I had a lot of great laughs it certainly made my day.

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  47. Absolutely brilliant idea! I used to be an absolute clean freak. I’ve gotten up in age, have medical issues where I had to pretty much stop doing everything and my house has totally suffered. I am getting to a point now where I can do things again but that’s limited to the dishes in the laundry at this point. I’m working on it hopefully someday I’ll get it back but in the meantime I do live with dust and lots of it. I freaking love this idea and I’ll have my grandson on it quickly. Thanks and yours looks fabulous!!

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  48. Yours may be the best solution to saggy bed skirts that I've ever seen. Thanks for the info-- and your sense of humor. Laughing is a good way to start the day.

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  49. Yes that is an amazing idea. But what's even more amazing is your gift for writing and humor! You are stinking hilarious! You have a gift and you should grow it girl! Looking forward to reading more of your posts.

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